April 30, 2010

Letting Go

Photo courtesy of Google.

Staring into the pieces of my broken heart,
I tried to piece them together but they keep falling apart,
I did not collect myself quick enough, I couldn't care less,
The cold crept in quickly, within me it infests,
I was lost, a soul afloat without it's carrier,
Now whimpering in a corner, shivering like a lost terrier,
Drenched in cold sweat, crying 'till the hiccups came,
There is no glory in this, only a burning dull pain,
No more fake smiles that can cover up these cloudy eyes,
I could no longer pretend, the spirit within me slowly dies,
Drifted into the dark cold night from your once strong grasp,
I succumbed to this heartache, I'm flatten like a wasp,
No wings to carry me to the Heavens,
I couldn't find the first cloud nor the seventh,
Then a Mighty voice from up above startled me out of my stupor,
"Collect yourself. Stop crying him a river,"
"He is not worth your tears after all the pain he's caused."
Before I took the plunge, the voice made me pause.
I fell on my knees crying with tremendous fervor,
My faith came to me the last minute, my old friend, my life saver,
I kneeled for a long moment when realization suddenly struck,
We had sacrificed for each other so much but maybe this is just tough luck,
So I praised God for giving me a sign one last time,
For giving me a chance of redemption, a message so sublime,
I looked at his picture in my hand, I kissed it again like I always do,
I suppressed the pain, the sorrow and the bursting love within - if he only knew,
Then I made a vow to little 'ol me,
If it is written by God in the Heavens, if it was really meant to be,
Then one day it will happen, when our lives will be aglow,
We will not be in this same position then, we'll be away from this plateau,
But now there's only one way for this feelings of mine to flow,
It will go down below, I am letting him go.

I am letting him go...

© www.enveeus.com


Razz Momma said...

what a beautiful piece honey.. i can feel the pain!
i want to cryyyyyyyyyy :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(

Razz Momma said...

don't let him go.. don't let him go if it's because of someone else.. let him go only if u know deep down inside that it was not meant to be..
so don't let him go sweetie

nia said...

whatever it is, sentiasa doa pada Allah ya. Dia ada dengan kita, sentiasa..

LV said...

if it's meant to be then it's meant to be..
don't let go for the wrong reasons.. stay strong hon :* :* :*
keep faith!

LV said...

anyway i think this is beautiful.. i told u u shuda become a writer..

well cuda shuda wuda :-D

Bella Enveeus said...

I can still become a writer now.. Maybe not as vigorous but I still have my heart on writing.. ;)

Bella Enveeus said...

No, not the wrong reasons at all.. Don't misunderstand.. Not letting him go forever.. But people say if you love somebody then let them go and when they come back then they're meant for you.. So that's what I'm doing.. For the benefit of both our conscience..

Bella Enveeus said...

Insya'Allah.. Will do nia.. Thanks.. *hugs*

Bella Enveeus said...

No, not letting him go like that.. Not for all the stupid reasons surrounding us now.. I'm still around.. (He's probably bored of always seeing my face already!) :-D :-D :-D

Bella Enveeus said...

Awww... Don't cry.. Let us all not cry anymore.. Let's smile and be happy now.. :* :*
But thanks though.. I finished this in 10 minutes (again!).. :-D

Rizal said...

Salam Bella..

Apa2 pun Rizal harap Bella jumpa apa yang dicari. Doa itu senjata utama. IsyaALLAH.

Tulisan Bella tuu memang indah.. baca pun tahu, empunya penulisnya tulis dengan penuh perasaan.

Kalau Rizal, cuma mampu buat.. "One little two, little three little indian..." :-D :-D

Bulan April ni nampaknya, mana2 Rizal pusing, banyak yang ada cerita sedih.

Harap2 semuanya semakin cerah : )

Rizal doakan yang terbaik buat Bella ya..

Bella Enveeus said...

LOL! Little indians eh? :-P

Yes, April has gone by and I hope my feelings of despair has followed suit. If not, then please shoot me! :-D
Thank you Rizal, saya sangat terharu dan berterima kasih dengan doa yang Rizal panjatkan ke Illahi.. Semoga didengarkan dan semoga lebih cerah masa hadapan seperti yang diharapkan..

Insya'Allah, may there be a silver lining behind the dark cloud hovering on top of my head at the moment.. Like Abraham Lincoln said in one of his speeches, "This too shall pass."

nia said...

how are u today dear?

Bella Enveeus said...

I'm ok today nia, thanks for your concern..

I know I haven't updated much, I think I must start to update again.. I've misplaced my inspiration somewhere. It's hard to let go of someone when they're the reason and the source of inspiration and strength in your life, right? :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(

Bluecrystaldude said...

Did you write this yourself? It's so beautifully written! I hope everything is getting better now :)

P/S: I am still trying to catch up will all the posts that I missed. hehe. Bear with me please :*

Bella Enveeus said...

Yeah I wrote this. Thanks Haaziq. Was feeling blue and this is one of the way I can express myself..

HAHA! It's alright Haaziq.. I sometimes had to do the same thing too coz there's no time to read others' posts everyday.. ;)

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